Empower Me! Blog

Code of Conduct- You Won’t Make Me Look Bad

For the last two weeks, the internet, particularly the tech sector, has been in a major uproar. The Cliff’s Notes version:

Girl goes to conference.

Girl attends session and sits in front of boys.

Boys make immature comments.

Girl gets upset and reports boys.

Patrollers confronts boys and makes them leave.

Girl goes back and tweets picture of boys and later blogs about the experience.

Tech community gets infuriated; backlash and mayhem ensues with sides divided.

Employers fire girl and one boy.

Fired boy apologizes.

Fury gets even hotter with slurs and charges of racism, sexism, and any kind of ‘ism you can dream of.

Now, of course my version is simplified for the sake of time, sanity and brevity. But you get the gist. I’m not here to analyze the chain of events (I wasn’t there). I really don’t care to voice my opinion (shit happens, I’m aware of it, doesn’t make me oblivious). Plus it’s not productive to continue the back and forth because there is no reason (or cooler heads) that will prevail. There is no winner in this.

The only thing’s for sure is we still, in 2013, have problems in the areas of diversity and professionalism. As I thought about this post, I wanted to carefully craft my words so no confusion would occur and it wouldn’t look like I was taking a side. But you know me, I shoot straight from the hip. So I choose to speak from the heart (as a Black/Latina BUSINESSWOMAN). And I’m pissed off that I’ve been put in a position to have to make that disclaimer.

First, I am not willfully ignoring the racial and gender issues that go on in the business world or in the tech industry. So don’t think I’m out of touch. Been there, done that, threw away the t-shirt. I’ll be 44 years old next week and trust me, I’ve seen a lot more than some of you will ever see, and less than some  of you have experienced. So I get it. But I want to approach this from a business owner’s point of view. Again, I have no dog in this fight.

There was a lot of backlash against the companies that fired the woman and one of the men who made the jokes. Backlash came before the firings (how dare he, he should be fired!) and after (how dare they, he’s a father of 3/she was standing up for herself). So either way, the companies weren’t going to win this battle that they didn’t ask to be a part of.  Point blank, without reviewing the evidence (read: OPINIONS) of what went down, if it had been my business, I probably would have reacted the same way. OK put the pitchforks down and hear me out.

When you go to work for a company, you agree to represent yourself in a dignified manner and agree to not bring embarrassment or harm to your employer. Fair enough to expect in exchange for your salary and benefits. And this representation is not limited to inside the four walls. Take a look at social media policies now. Companies are very clear about how employees are allowed to handle any kind of messaging and engagement on behalf of the company. Clearly, all of this that went down did affect the companies. One of the companies was victim of a DDOS attack (they shut down their website in an attack!). Most businesses, especially ones heavily reliant on the internet to service it’s customers, lose money each hour their websites are down. I don’t know about you, but I don’t play with my money or my reputation.

When you attend an event, on behalf of your employer, and wearing identifying badges of your employer, you have an obligation to conduct yourself in a positive manner. The gentlemen making the jokes did not. Sure, we can debate all day long about the context of the jokes or how childish they were. But we won’t. The point is their inappropriateness reflected on their employer. The woman who reported the infraction too was representing her company. And this is where it gets sticky…ladies, don’t jump down my throat. Although she followed protocol and didn’t have to be subjected to such conversation, she did not have the right to involve her employer (whether unintentional or not) in this.

And this brings us to the major point in this whole battle. Employers you must do better about training and informing your staff. Now this could have been a teaching moment but both companies chose to terminate their respective employees. Not a decision I would have made, but I’m not running their companies. In this extra heightened era of gender discrimination, you have an obligation to make sure your staff, both genders (yes BOTH genders) understand what is acceptable and what is not. You can no longer assume that just because we’re all adults, everyone should know and play nice. Men have to understand that certain conversations are offensive to some women. Women have to learn that not everything is said from a place of malice. Yes there are circumstances where both of these will happen. But it’s up to employers to educate them on how to handle these situations when it’s on company time, and sad to say, when they’re off the clock.

I have specific guidelines about how my team is allowed to represent the Empower Me! brand. Some might say it’s not right and I don’t have the right to control what others do. Well I don’t control what others do. But when it puts my brand in jeopardy  I absolutely have a right. I’ve worked too hard to build this company to let the foolish choices of another person tear it down.

So who’s side do I take in this? The woman? The guy who got fired? The employers? I take nobody’s side. I won’t automatically defend a woman because I am one; I won’t automatically defend a business owner because I am one; and I won’t automatically defend a person because we share the same race. If that makes me a sell-out then so be it. I look at FACTS, not opinions, and I don’t decide on emotion.

If you take away nothing else from this incident, understand that there are still inequities, arm your staff with the right information to make better decisions, and focus on what we can do collectively going forward to make things better.

Tomorrow I’ll be talking about Ethics, Diversity & Consequences and things employers can do to promote inclusive diversity, protect their reputations, and how to deal with unexpected situations caused by employees on Views From the Top. Make sure you tune in at 9AM EST.

Til next time,

Adrienne Graham
Act right even when nobody else is looking!

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Adrienne Graham is the Founder & CEO of Empower Me! Corporation (www.empowerme.org), a Growth Strategies consultancy with brand extensions in media, publishing and small business & entrepreneurial education. She provides Strategic Business Growth consulting services to companies with high growth potential to assist clients in creating processes and strategies to effectively run, grow and position their business for success. She helps clients get paid more by giving away less for free, allowing them to be more profitable and NOT be a broke brand. She is the host Views From the Top Radio Show the publisher of Empower Me! Magazine, and the creator Empower Me Institute, Empower Me! Radio, Empowered for Growth TV & Next Level Business Strategies. Her writing and shows focus on Career Management, Networking Strategies, Entrepreneurial Success and Small Business Management. Check out her new company The Red Shoe Agency.

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